here comes goodbye,,,,here comes the last time

your love is a lie-simple plan



I fall asleep by the telephone
It's 2 O'clock and I'm waiting up alone
Tell me where have you been?
I found a note with another name
You blow a kiss, but it just don't feel the same
Cause I can feel that you're gone

I can't bite my tongue forever
While you try to play it cool
You can hide behind your stories
But don't take me for a fool

You can tell me that there's nobody else
(But I feel it)
You can tell me that you're home by yourself
(But I see it)
You can look into my eyes and pretend all you want
But I know
Your love is just a lie
(Lie)
It's nothing but a lie
(Lie)

You look so innocent
But the guilt in your voice gives you away
Yeah you know what I mean
How does it feel when you kiss when you know that i trust you
And do you think about me when he fucks you?
Could you be more obscene?

So dont try to say you're sorry
Or try to make it right
Don't waste your breath because it's too late, it's too late.

You can tell me that there's nobody else
(But I feel it)
You can tell me that you're home by yourself
(But I see it)
You can look into my eyes and pretend all you want
But I know, I know,
Your love is just a lie
(Lie)
It's nothing but a lie
(Lie)
You're nothing but a lie

You can tell me that there's nobody else
(But I feel it)
You can tell me that you're home by yourself
(But I see it)
You can look into my eyes and pretend all you want
But I know, I know
Your love is just a lie
(Lie
I know you're nothing but a lie
(Lie)
Lie
(Lie)
Lie
(Lie)
Lie

Your love is just a lie

my lashes are dry,,,purple teardrops i cry

so this a blog about my trip to Fredericton

got up that morning and took mariah home,
then came home and finished packing
i wasn't feeling that great but i've gotton pretty
used to feeling sick
so i just kept on going
my nana showed up and i was still sick we stopped three times before
leaving florenceville
so i asked her to take me home
when we got home i laid on the bathroom floor for about and hour
then i finally said lets go
because i really wanted to go
as soon as we got on the highway
i threw up =(
but then i fell asleep in the backseat
and slept all the way to freddy =)
when we got there i went shopping
i got ---
3 dresses
2 pairs of pants
2 sweaters
3/4 new tops
they're all really awesome :)
then we went to the hotel
went out for supper at brewbakers
came back to the hotel ordered a movie
"Confessions of a Shopaholic"
i wasn't expecting much but it surprised me
it was pretty good

the next day......
got up went out for breakfast
then went to the art gallery
then went to the garrison ale house for lunch

after this we went to be-dazle
its a really high end jewelery shop
the owner trudy gallagher
showed us how they made everything
and then sat us down to make our own set of earrings
she looked at what i created and
said she was amazed
she told me " if someone new to making
this kind of stuff can create something
that amazing in this short period of timing
then i can't imagine what you would do after some
training" she also told me that if
i ever wanted a job to come back there and she would personally
train me to work in her store
AMAZING I KNOW!!!!!!
i was completely blown away!
someone recognized my passion for
creating things
my passion for art
and design

i was so happy after that =)
we went back to the gallery
to talk to the aboriginal speaker
because she was an amazing person
then we went back to the hotel
nana picked up Zane and we came
back home

mj died today
i diden't really like his stuff
but its still sad

i called rachel tonight im gonna go see her tomorrow
after work
i miss her a lot like so much its unbelievable
i also really miss lauren i keep thinking that
shes still here and i can go see her anytime
but then i realize she really is gone

ilove you and miss you both so much <3

it's hard with you not around

==so i've been obsessed with this song since ever ,,,, i love it

i'll be missing you- P.Diddy + Faith Evans


Seems like yesterday we used to rock the show
I laced the track, you locked the flow
So far from hanging on the block for dough
Notorious, they got to know that
Life ain't always what it seem to be
Words can't express what you mean to me
Even though you're gone, we still a team
Through your family, I'll fulfill your dream
In the future, can't wait to see
If you open up the gates for me
Reminisce some time, the night they took my friend
Try to black it out, but it plays again
When it's real, feelings hard to conceal
Cant imagine all the pain I feel
Give anything to hear half your breath
I know you still living your life, after death

Every step I take, every move I make
Every single day, every time I pray
Ill be missing you
Thinking of the day, when you went away
What a life to take, what a bond to break
Ill be missing you


Its kinda hard with you not around
Know you in heaven smiling down
Watching us while we pray for you
Every day we pray for you
Till the day we meet again
In my heart is where I'll keep you friend
Memories give me the strength I need to proceed
Strength I need to believe
My thoughts big I just can't define
Wish I could turn back the hands of time
Us in the 6, shop for new clothes and kicks
You and me taking flicks
Making hits, stages they receive you on
I still can't believe you're gone
Give anything to hear half your breath
I know you still living you're life, after death

somebody tell me why



On that morning
When this life is over
I know
Ill see your face



Every night I pray, every step I take
Every move I make, every single day
Every night I pray, every step I take
every day that passes
Every move I make, every single day
is a day that I get closer
to seeing you again
Every night I pray, every step I take
we miss you big... and we wont stop
Every move I make, every single day
cause we can't stop... that's right
Every night I pray, every step I take
Every move I make, every single day

you got to get out ,,you can't stand to see me shaking

so i went back to the pills tonight
its been a couple months since ive taken them
but it only feels like seeing an old friend
they went down so easy; no struggles here
i took them
right after i argued with Steven

i don't even know what happened
he was just talking about how every girl breaks his heart
i told him i would never break his heart
and he automatically assumes i want more than friendship

no i just mean that i want to be there for you
when every other girl breaks your heart
i'll be there for you
i'll always be that friend that sticks by you

now i dont think he even wants that
i was so angry none of what i said made any sense
im just so confused right now

i dont know why im so sorry
but i just am
i just want to talk to steven without him
being angry at me for what happened tonight
im sorry im doing this again
but where else do i turn to?

i know better not to be friends with boys with girlfriends

Happy ever after
Is a concept I'll never believe
in. I would be content to sample
some little taste of happiness
today, tonight, right now, though
I know
without a doubt that tomorrow
will arrive, saturated with pain.
Life is like that. At least
my life. And honestly,
I can't
think of anyone whose life
is any different. The price
tag for joy is misery. I don't
want to go inside but I can't
stay
out here on the grass all night.

~Identical

i got a feeling tonights gonna be a good night

for Steven--------

It's amazing, I'm the reason
Everybody fired up this evening
I'm exhausted, barely breathing
Holding on to what I believe in

No matter what you'll never take that from me
My reign is as far as your eyes can see

It's amazin', so amazin', so amazin', so amazin'
It's amazin', so amazin', so amazin', so amazin'
It's amazin'
(Let's go)

I'm a monster, I'm a killer
I know I'm wrong, yeah
I'm a problem that'll never ever be solved

And no matter what you'll never take that from me
My reign is as far as your eyes can see

It's amazin', so amazin', so amazin', so amazin'
It's amazin', so amazin', so amazin', so amazin'
It's amazin'
(Let's go)

I'm a monster, I'm a maven
I know this world is changin'
Never gave in, never gave up
I'm the only thing I'm afraid of

No matter what you'll never take that from me
My reign is as far as your eyes can see

It's amazin', so amazin', so amazin', so amazin'
It's amazin', so amazin', so amazin', so amazin'
It's amazin', so amazin', so amazin', so amazin'
It's amazin', so amazin', so amazin', so amazin'
It's amazin'

I'm amazin', yeah, I'm all that
If I ain't on my grind then what you call that?
Victorious, yeah, we warriors
We make history, strive off victory

Standing at my podium
I'm trying watch my sodium
Die high blood pressure
You even let the Feds getcha

I'm amazin', born on the full moon
I was bred to get it in, no spoon
That's why I'm so goose, summer time, no juice
Big family, small house, no rooms

They like, oh God, why you go so hard?
Look what he's been through
He deserves an applause

So amazin', so amazin', so amazin'
It's amazin', so amazin', so amazin', so amazin'
It's amazin', so amazin', so amazin', so amazin'
It's amazin', so amazin', so amazin', so amazin'
It's amazin'

we avoid the topics .. we make the kids have secrets

i cant even write anymore
my passion is my poetry
my poetry is my release
how do i release now

they keep asking me whats wrong
i dont eat, i dont sleep, i dont feel anymore
at least i try and pretend not to feel

i feel like im losing everything
my words were all i had left
and they are slowly slipping away

im not going to church tomorrow
i think God hates me i never go anymore
i try and pretend im perfect pretend like
im the perfect little christian im not
im so far from it i just wish i could go back

go back and take everything back
everything ive done
all those things i said
whats wrong with me
im typing my feelings on a blog
im the perfect picture of teen angst

trying not to feel the pain

Let me know that I've done wrong,
When I've known this all along,
I go around a time or two,
Just to waste my time with you.

Tell me all that you've thrown away,
Find out games you don't wanna play,
You are the only one that needs to know--

I'll keep you my dirty little secret,
Don't tell anyone or you`ll be just another regret,
My dirty little secret,
Who has to know?

When we live such fragile lives,
It's the best way we survive,
I go around a time or two,
Just to waste my time with you,

Tell me all that you've thrown away,
find out games you don't wanna play,
you are the only one that needs to know---

I'll keep you my dirty little secret,
Don't tell anyone or you'll be just another regret,
My dirty little secret.

Who has to know?
The way she feels inside
Those thoughts I can't deny
These sleeping thoughts won't lie
And now I try to lie
It's eating me apart
Trace this life back!

I'll keep you my dirty little secret,
Don't tell anyone or you'll be just another regret.



I'll keep you my dirty little secret,
Don't tell anyone or you'll be just another regret,
My dirty little secret,
Dirty little secret,
Dirty little secret.





Who has to know?

ransom notes keep falling out your mouth

Somewhere in the world now
You're getting out of bed
You're standing on your own feet
To shake your sleeping head

If you win you take the credit
If you lose you take the blame
No one knows where you are
And they never will again

I can still remember the day you up and left
I swear it was a moment I never will forget
You said you'd take no prisoners
But thats just what you did
You took my heart captive
Hope you know that you are missed

Welcome to your lies
Welcome to goodbye
You see the big world
Through small town eyes
Welcome to the point
The point of no return
Let the past ignite and memories burn
I say
Welcome to wherever you are

I can see you in the doorway
With the daylight flooding in
It must have hid your secrets
I know more than I did then

Looking back I should have noticed
There's a longing in your eyes
And underneath the surface
Theres a truth you could not hide

All the time we spend together
Every night we stayed up late
All the looks that I forgotten
And the plans we never made

Do you ever wonder
About everything you left
Do you question your decisions
Do you ever second guess

Welcome to your lies
Welcome to goodbye
You see the big world
Through small town eyes
Welcome to the point
The point of no return
Let the past ignite and memories burn
I say
Welcome to wherever you are

You are
You are
Wherever you
Are

Welcome to your lies
Welcome to goodbye
You see the big world
Through small town eyes
Welcome to the point
The point of no return
Let the past ignite and memories burn
I say
Say

Welcome to your lies
Welcome to goodbye
You see the big world
Through small town eyes
Welcome to the point
The point of no return
Let the past ignite and memories burn
I say
Say
Welcome to wherever you are

let the rain wash away my yesterday

the rain pours down washing the sun away
i wish it could wash everything away
wash away my fears, pains, and heartache
this rain gives me too much time
to sit here and think
i don't want to think about all the wrong things ive done,
about every wrong path ive decided to walk down,
of all this love i've too freely given away

but some memories just can't be forgotten
and all the good times are too easily forgotton
i want to remember all the good times
i shared with you but all i remember are
the horrible things you did to me
and the torture you put me through

im not ready to forgive
and i promise you i will never forgot

i wont be sleeping tonight

crying myself to sleep tonight
because i want so bad to help him
and he just left
im so scared and all i can do is cry
why cant i just be strong?
why is my heart breaking?
i wish he was on then at least i would know
that he's ok

i'll be missing you

i let him in
it was so hard
i dident want him to know all the secrets
but it felt good for him to know the truth
now im just waiting for him to leave
i know i should be just enjoying everyday talking to him
but im always afraid he'll leave that he just wont want
to deal with me anymore wont want to talk to me anymore
my history is that once i find someone i think i can talk to
think i can relate to they just leave with not even a goodbye

my relationships with guys really arent the greatest
and ive told him a lot maybe too much
why do i trust him so much?
should i be scared with all the information i've given him
but i'm not scared i do trust him and thats probably the scariest
part besides my dad(step-dad) he's the only guy ive let in

just please dont hurt me i really do believe in you

those walls i built , baby they're tumbling down

wishing everything was just like the movies
just like perfection
crying out
and then my prince steps in and saves the day
my prince takes all the troubles of this world away
wrapped in his arms and he knows just what to say

he knows what i need to hear, he knows how i can't
feel but says here anyway because he knows someday
i will be okay
someday i will be able to love him just as much as he loves me
i will be able to tell him all the things he told me
cradle him in my arms and promise everything will be okay

and as my emotion pours out ink onto blank paper
i glance back up at the door hoping he's going to burst through
and rescue me from all the monsters of this world

but this isn't the movies
this will never be perfection
all thats left is the love i have for him
and my love isn't perfect but its all i have left

if i got down on my knees and i told you i was yours forever would you bend down to take my hand?

the last time i slept was lying in
your arms but i can't forget what happened
you promised you'd be there and when i came
running you had disappeared
lying in the cold and darkness
reaching out for you only to realize
you aren't here and that you'll
never come again
i wish i could fix everything
that you broke in me but it's to hard
trying to put all the pieces back together
im in a million pieces
im pulled in every direction
and your not here to tell me what to do
your not here to tell me where to go
the things i would do to be in your
arms again...